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I have had quite a revelation.
Those of you who, like me, have tried to introduce some
spiritual discipline into their lives, such as meditation, prayer,
contemplation of spiritual matters, and ‘right action’ will probably know that
there is a lot of confusion around the whole concept of meditation. Far from
there just being the main two types of meditation, ‘concentrative’ and‘mindful’, such as the likes of Wikipedia maintain, there are all sorts of
other practices going under the broad heading of meditation.
For example, there are ‘guided meditations’ which use
visualisation, (this is used a lot in Kabbalah and also in transpersonal
psychotherapies.) I have also seen ‘kenosis’ – self-forgetting – referred to as
meditation, which always struck me as being the opposite, at least in day to
day practice, of ‘mindfulness’, though it does sometimes involve intense
concentration.
As you might know, I set up a daily routine of prayer,meditation etc. when I left work last July, - I outlined it in my blog post
‘Daily Practice’. I used an online tool for meditation which made it about as
easy as it could be. This is not the first time I have tried to meditate
regularly and even before Christmas I was finding myself dreading this daily 20
minute meditation (again), and finding all sorts of reasons for not doing it
(again).
The problem has been that, even when I have managed to meditate regularly, for over a year, I have never found the process beneficial, either in the doing, or the outcomes. I had been trying to resign myself to the fact that, tedious as meditation was, it was just something that had to be done.
At the same time I was discovering that singing in a choir, which I
started to do in November, was resulting in a ‘kenosis’ that was immediately
giving me all the benefits that meditation is supposed to;- nourishment of the
soul, positive emotions, and physical relaxation which I hadn’t experienced
since an hour’s silversmithing as a teenager.
When I mentioned to one of my Kabbalah teachers that I
intensely disliked meditation he said “So do something else” but that was just
before term ended, and hasn’t resumed yet, and I haven’t had a chance to ask
him if self-forgetting would be a good ‘something else’.
So today I put the question out on the London Integral
Circle’s list and got the following enlightening and uplifting reply from HelenTitchen-Beeth, to whom I am profoundly grateful. I reproduce it here, and hope
that others find it as liberating:
“Sufi teacher Llewelyn Vaughn-Lee distinguishes between
masculine and feminine spiritual practices, and classifies meditation among the
masculine, ascending approaches. He suggests that the masculine needs
disciplining, whereas the feminine needs to be allowed to love what it loves
and go with her appetites and inclinations of the moment. This could be one
reason why meditation doesn't work for you and immersion in embodied practices
- like silversmithing or singing - does.
I must admit that I have moved away from any specific
spiritual paths, and towards the practice of direct, unintermediated immersion
in the kosmos - which is tantamount to saying that I do what I feel like, when
I feel like doing it, and I no longer bother to 'should' on myself about things
- either spiritual or mundane. Whatever relieves your anxiety and brings you
joy brings you closer to your natural state of being - as you were born to be
in order to fill your unique function in creation. It also increases the
likelihood of your inspiring joy and elation in others. And what else is
spiritual practice for, ultimately, if not for our individual and collective
flourishing?”
Many thanks to Helen Titchen-Beeth for this insight.
I would be interested in the views of others on this topic.
